In my journey as, first, a therapy client, and then a psychotherapist, one of the most striking things I've learned has been that we tend to hold deep knowledge about what we actually want, need, and feel. That the signals our bodies and brains deliver to us aren't random. The anger that we might try to push down can actually tell us where a boundary of ours - one we might not have even recognized for ourselves yet - is being crossed. The tiredness or pain in our bodies might be telling us to slow down, to pay attention to an important part of ourselves, an important feeling, that we've tried to ignore out of fear. When we have a hard time getting moving on a project, it isn't a character flaw - it's giving us important information about a need we have, perhaps around relaxing our own expectations for ourselves, or getting more clarity around what we're trying to do.
It makes sense that we don't always listen to these inner signals of ours, for so many reasons. In today's world, many of us are busy just trying to survive, and might feel like turning inward is unhelpful or a waste of time. We might fear that we'll discover a part of ourselves that's asking for a change that we don't yet feel ready to implement in our lives. We might have learned throughout our lives that our feelings are too big or threatening to handle, so ignoring them becomes the default. I believe, however, that if we're able to receive support in slowing down and listening to that inner voice, we can start to truly move toward an easier, more aligned, more fulfilling life, with more fulfilling connections - with others and with ourselves. I love to support folks moving through this type of work.
I often work with clients who might be feeling stuck, unhappy, isolated, or overwhelmed. I also see many clients who are neurodiverse, and hold lived experience with AuDHD myself. I love working with creative people, people who have self-identified as "people pleasers," anyone experiencing relationship difficulties or life transitions - whatever it is you're going through currently, and whoever you are, I'd love to chat about it!
I am a graduate of the Toronto Institute of Relational Psychotherapy and am trained as a relational therapist, which means that I think about the rules we learn implicitly in our lives about relationships - who were we taught that we need to be in order to stay in connection with others? These often-invisible-to-us rules deeply impact how we relate to those around us, but also how we relate to ourselves, and to what degree we're able to listen to that aforementioned inner voice. If we learned our needs were too big and the people around us needed them to be smaller - we'll ignore anything inside of us that's trying to alert us to a need we have. If we learned we had to constantly fight for ourselves, we might have a harder time listening to an inner voice of ours that's asking for some softness. I would love to support you in letting all of the complex pieces of yourself have space to share and room to shine.
If my profile resonates with you, please don't hesitate to reach out - I would love to hear from you, and to have the chance to chat about how we can work together! :)
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