Jeff O'Neill

Hello! My name is Jenessa, and I’m so glad you’re here. Whether you’re new to therapy or returning after some time, I’m glad our paths have crossed. My journey into becoming a therapist has been shaped by a deep appreciation for people’s stories. My approach is trauma-informed and person-centred, drawing from AEDP, somatic approaches, attachment, EFT, and IFS. I also have introductory training in sand-tray therapy. I work with kids, teens and adults, with the most passion around working with: - young adults navigating relationships, life transitions, grief or trauma. - Those struggling with body image concerns. - Religious deconstruction and church hurt. I look forward to being able to connect with you! All bodies and identities are welcome in my space, and going at your own pace in therapy is what I hold very sacred. Your story matters.

Welcome. As a therapist with queer-lived experience and a heartfelt desire to see people thrive, not just survive, I look forward to meeting you wherever you are in this moment. You might be carrying something you've held on to on your own for a long time, or you and your partner might keep arriving at the same hard conversation. Either way, I'm glad you're here. I'm a Registered Clinical Counsellor (RCC) offering individual and relationship therapy, in person in East Vancouver and virtually across BC and Ontario. My practice is split evenly between the two. I'm a gay cisgender man, and I come to this work with lived experience as part of a marginalized community. My work is queer-affirming, and I welcome people in all relationship structures, including polyamorous and open relationships. You won't need to explain or justify who you are or how you love before we get to what brought you in. In individual therapy, people often come to me when anxiety or self-doubt is taking up too much room, or when a change in their life has left them unsure of who they are now. I draw on Internal Family Systems, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, and an attachment-based approach. Together we get curious about the different parts of you, including the ones that are critical or afraid, and about how your early relationships shaped the way you relate to yourself and to others today. Over time, most clients find they can meet themselves with more compassion and make choices that reflect what matters to them. As a member of the LGTBQ2+ community, I offer a safe space to those looking to explore gender and sexuality issues, and lived experience navigating the world as queer individual. Many people come to me because of work. Before training as a counsellor, I spent fifteen years inside the corporate world, in tech and human resources, so the context is already in the room. I know what a reorganization costs and what it is like to sit in a performance review that isn't going the way you hoped. I see burnout as what happens when the demands on you keep outpacing what you have to give, often in a workplace that makes it hard to say so. In our sessions, we work on the conversations you've been avoiding and on who you are when the job that has defined you stops fitting. Along the way, we reconnect you with your sense of agency, so your decisions line up with the person you want to be. In relationship and couples therapy, I use Emotionally Focused Therapy and the Gottman Method. We slow down the moments where you miss each other and look at what each of you is feeling and needing underneath. From there, we build ways of talking and listening that bring you closer. Some couples come to strengthen something that is already good but could be better. Others come at a turning point, such as opening their relationship or rebuilding trust. I think of myself as a fellow traveller. I walk alongside you while you find your way, and I treat you as the expert on your own life. I bring training, structure, and an outside view to help you navigate the current phase of life you're in. As an RCC, my sessions are covered by many extended health plans. If you'd like to find out whether working together is the right next step, you can book a free 20-minute consultation.

Do you ever feel like you don’t quite belong—like you’re putting on a mask just to make it through the day? Maybe life feels heavier than it should, or quietly exhausting. I work with people who are navigating anxiety, procrastination, imposter syndrome, and a lingering sense of disconnection. Together, we’ll gently explore what may be keeping you stuck and begin creating a life that feels more authentic and more your own. With a PhD in chemistry and a background outside of mental health, I understand the pressures of high performance, the weight of expectations, and the loneliness that can come with feeling different. I work relationally, offering a calm, curious space where you can begin to reconnect with yourself. I offer a free 30-minute consultation so you can get a sense of how I work and ask any questions. You don’t need to have it all figured out — just a willingness to take one step. If something in this profile resonates with you, I invite you to reach out and begin the conversation.

In my journey as, first, a therapy client, and then a psychotherapist, one of the most striking things I've learned has been that we tend to hold deep knowledge about what we actually want, need, and feel. That the signals our bodies and brains deliver to us aren't random. The anger that we might try to push down can actually tell us where a boundary of ours - one we might not have even recognized for ourselves yet - is being crossed. The tiredness or pain in our bodies might be telling us to slow down, to pay attention to an important part of ourselves, an important feeling, that we've tried to ignore out of fear. When we have a hard time getting moving on a project, it isn't a character flaw - it's giving us important information about a need we have, perhaps around relaxing our own expectations for ourselves, or getting more clarity around what we're trying to do. It makes sense that we don't always listen to these inner signals of ours, for so many reasons. In today's world, many of us are busy just trying to survive, and might feel like turning inward is unhelpful or a waste of time. We might fear that we'll discover a part of ourselves that's asking for a change that we don't yet feel ready to implement in our lives. We might have learned throughout our lives that our feelings are too big or threatening to handle, so ignoring them becomes the default. I believe, however, that if we're able to receive support in slowing down and listening to that inner voice, we can start to truly move toward an easier, more aligned, more fulfilling life, with more fulfilling connections - with others and with ourselves. I love to support folks moving through this type of work. I often work with clients who might be feeling stuck, unhappy, isolated, or overwhelmed. I also see many clients who are neurodiverse, and hold lived experience with AuDHD myself. I love working with creative people, people who have self-identified as "people pleasers," anyone experiencing relationship difficulties or life transitions - whatever it is you're going through currently, and whoever you are, I'd love to chat about it! I am a graduate of the Toronto Institute of Relational Psychotherapy and am trained as a relational therapist, which means that I think about the rules we learn implicitly in our lives about relationships - who were we taught that we need to be in order to stay in connection with others? These often-invisible-to-us rules deeply impact how we relate to those around us, but also how we relate to ourselves, and to what degree we're able to listen to that aforementioned inner voice. If we learned our needs were too big and the people around us needed them to be smaller - we'll ignore anything inside of us that's trying to alert us to a need we have. If we learned we had to constantly fight for ourselves, we might have a harder time listening to an inner voice of ours that's asking for some softness. I would love to support you in letting all of the complex pieces of yourself have space to share and room to shine. If my profile resonates with you, please don't hesitate to reach out - I would love to hear from you, and to have the chance to chat about how we can work together! :)